I'm Awake - Maybe

At my last doctor visit, I was prescribed Ambien so I could get some sleep. Very odd drug. The first night, not five minutes after taking the pill, I was so woozy I wasn't sure if it was the Ambien or just what was going on, since I had taken my pain medication too. I felt a bit odd the next morning, especially since I was wide awake at 3:30 in the morning. I slept about 4 hours, so no more sleep for me I guess. Damn.

The next night, I take my pill and same thing. Within five minutes, I am all over the place. Mentally and physically. I could barely make it to the bed. My daughter was here when I took the pill, as we had been trying to do some things online. I do manage to crawl into the bed and pass out. But I had wild dreams all night. I had three people who wanted to follow me on Twitter, one of them is a very good friend. The other two, I don't know from Adam. I wasn't sure the next morning - this time at 4:00, if I had dreamed this whole Twitter thing and the prior evening or not. It wasn't until I logged on that I was aware I had not dreamed it all from the night before. It was simply one of the weirdest feeling I have ever had.

That same day, I am sick to my stomach and have problems all day long. My brain isn't quite working right, at least I don't think it was. I was having off the wall thoughts - well, more than the normal off the wall thoughts. It felt like I was sleepwalking all day long. Very, weird feeling if you've never experienced it.

Last night, I tried it again. I figured maybe my body just needed to get used to it. Maybe not. I was awake off and on all night. At least I'm pretty sure I was. It seemed like I was anyway. Crazy, mixed up thoughts and dreams. I even seem to remember I smoked a cigarette or two every time I woke up. I'm feeling real strange again today too. I've read all the info on the drug. I guess it's a good thing I'm not driving anywhere. It's probably best if I stay out of the car. At least I think so maybe?

Like I said, it's an odd drug. I hope this partictular blog is making sense. I'm going to try the Ambien again tonight though anyway. I can't shut off my mind. I need to forget some things. I would like to forget them permanently. I need to sleep.